If I am So Wonderful, then why am I still Single?

If you hate corny and mind annoying stuffs, stop reading.

I’ve been thinking of writing this so long time ago but I was afraid it might humiliate me.. (because I’m not going to hide this).

Everyone is getting married and I still couldn’t imagine myself being a bride, I never even a part of a wedding ceremony, never a bride’s maid, so I guess that’s a sign telling me I’ll grow old single--- I hate to, I don’t want to but I have a feeling that I would.

I still cling on this quote

“Women are like the apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. The boys dont want to reach for the good ones, because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead they get the apples from the ground that arent as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them when in reality they are amazing! They have to wait for the right guy to come along. The one who is brave enough to climb to the top of the tree.”

I’m 28, single, never been into a real relationship and it makes me ask this, ‘if I am so wonderful then why am I still single? And honestly, it makes me feel so unpretty! I’m trying to convince myself that I am also an apple on that peak of that tree waiting for someone I deserved, but maybe I am wrong, I’m just one of those apples on the ground hiding on the grass. I’m sorry self I’m not suppose to tolerate this pity for myself. I was a late bloomer and suddenly I’m now accelerated into facing the midlife crisis.

Maybe I over guarded my heart, now I couldn’t get out from my comfort zone. I stopped growing from that wallflower teenage girl, shy and not confident. I’m still that young girl who waits for her crush to get notice her (not doing a single move)--- but unfortunately he wouldn’t. I’m still that someone who wouldn’t go out for a date with anyone she thought she would never like—though I tried once. I’m still that girl who’s so scared to hurt someone else’s feelings. I’m still that insecure lad who would never try to beautify herself, she doesn’t know how actually.

I’m not choosy either, I’m just a hopeless romantic believing and waiting for that someone to come into my life and live happily ever after, I know I’m such a loser to believe in that… I guess he’ll never come… no one is brave enough to dare.

And I guess I would stay like this forever… but I must not be sad. Oh, I am not sad.

I must be happy no matter what.. It doesn’t mean I must have what other has. I’ll be fine… I’ll be fine…  I am fine!