Today, I'm crazy

Hey! I'm already feeling really sleepy.. but it seems like I have a lot to say kahit pa wala naman tong masyadong halaga...

Syempre, Monday ngayon, magsisimula talaga lagi yan sa Monday Morning Sickness.. yung tipong tamad na tamad kang pumasok... alam mo naman ako, nag iinarte pag Monday. Haha

I was evaluated too today... I was given a chance to contest my ratings... kilala mo ako, di masyado ako demanding... pero yung evaluation ko e yung parang so underrated! Yung parang sinadyang kelangan talagang icontest mo... parang, whatttt??? Do I really deserve that?? Hehe... or yung tipong sasabihin mo na, " are you testing me to fight for what I deserve?? ... and I did fight for what I deserve...

At the end part  of the evaluation, I was asked about that moment na umabsent ako dahil pinapaattend ako ng meeting sa head office.. I posted about that, naalala mo ba? Diko alam pano magrereact?? Pero natatawa ako.. I was asked if "not feeling well" was only my excuse, so I could not attend the meeting.. I was caught off guard, lam mo namang obvious pag nagsisinungaling ako, haha... I answered.. "I was really feeling not better that time but I can endure it, partly I really didn't want to attend, kase pang PM lang naman yun, pano pag ang tanong e opinion ng mga PM, e d para naman akong outcast dun, tsaka ayaw ko rin na baka masagot sagot ko pa si sir na ayaw ko umattend".. basta ganon yung point ng sagot ko pero sana sinabi ko na lang masama loob ko kaya sumama pakiramdam ko.. haha.. pero baka rude naman.

I don't know what I really feel, pero natatawa ako.. I was surprised with her questioning me that.. because the day after my absence.. i was treated by them normally, extra nice pa nga e! Kaya akala ko, grabe naman, di man lang nila nafeel na nagrebelde ako.. haha.. but this day, I was like asking myself, nadissappoint ko ba talaga sila?? Nathretened? Di ba nila inexpect na kaya kong gawin yun?? That was few weeks ago, pero bakit pinaabot pa sa evaluation yung pagquestion non... but its not making me regret my action....  I would still do the same thing.

And we talked about my QS again.. I told her everything.. yung mga reklamo ko... but after that, medyo naguilty ako kase medyo behave yung QS ko today... kahit papano naman minsan may mabuti rin syang ginawa.. mga 15% haha..  shall I feel really guilty?? Sabi ko nga, magtitiis na akong magtrain ulit ng Q.S kesa naststress akong nakikita syang halos masuka sa ginagawa! Di na nga productive.. Exaggerated pero madalas talaga akong mastress dahil sa kanya... dapat ba akong maguilty???? Yung patience ko abot ozone layer na pero baka yung impact ng actions nung QS ko e hanggang Jupiter kaya diko kinaya... haha.. sabihin mo na! Maguguilty ba ako??

Anyway.. 3:30  pm , lee called me he'll meet me... that he will be out around 5pm.. so I said yes, kaso 5:30 na, andun pa sya sa site nila... I was kinda naiinip and tired... so with my typical excuse, sabi ko uuwi na ako, maglalaba pa akong uniform... I think I sounded impatient... kaya ihanda ko na rin sarili ko pag di na nagpakita sa akin si lee... hehe.. tuluyan na akong mawawalan na friends... yes, because I am too bad, i'm driving people away.. hmppp.. okay lang, sanay naman ako.... ako pa????? Hehe.. kung ayaw nila sa ugali ko, di wag... ang sama ko talaga noh?? Tingin ko may sumpong ako ng pagiging abnormal today.... Hehe

And one thing.. mabalik tayo sa evaluation.. my recommendation was... " be sociable ......", see??? Haha

Sige na.. itigil na ang kabaliwang ito.

Good night!