18th of May :(

Hey... wala lang.. I think there's just a need for me to express how I've been feeling today..  Our Area Manager just had a closed door "talk" with me this morning... asking me seriously to extend my stay for about two months... It's been an  issue weeks ago but I just didn't take it seriously.. and at some corner of my mind... I was thinking of staying a bit longer... dahil gusto ko pa nga sila makasama sa konting panahon.. kase tingin ko, pag umaalis na ako.. baka di ko na sila makita pa ever.. chos! Pero oo nga.

Mabalik tayo sa usapan namin... honestly, as I entered his office, wala pa akong fixed na desisyon non... pero parang may nagsasabing panindigan ko na yung desisyon ko... and that's it.. I told him na kakayanin na naman siguro ng department ko na wala ako... na may mga bagay na di ko gustong gawin or labag sa kalooban ko kahit kelangang kelangan kaya aalis ako lalo nat magraramadan na... and blah blah blah... there... everything I've said implied that I can't stay anymore and he accepted that.. diko alam pero parang may mali... biglang doubtful ako sa desisyon ko... though the words came out from my lips had made the decision pero bakit naiiyak ako after that conversation??? !! Arte ko ah. Haha

Basta... ipapaDyos ko na lang to.. diko man alam ano plano ko.. bahala na Sya. May He blessed me with wisdom kung ano nararapat na gawin. Papaubaya ko na to sa Kanya..

I have to let go of what's bothering me the whole day.

GOOD NIGHT!

Venice Grand Canal

Today, Margaux and I went to Venice Grand Canal.. it was not planned.. it just hit me this morning when I realized that I may not able have the time to visit it.

 

The place was nice.. though most of the stores are closed yet..

Then next stop: singing!! I missed singing.. haha

good night

14th Of May

Bored!! And this explains this! Haha.. sorrey!!

When I got home this afternoon...  yung tanong mo sa sarili.. what now??  Nalulungkot pa rin ako.. haha.. kelan matatapos na to?? Sanay na sanay naman akong mag isa bat ngayon ang hirap na??? Darn that!! Yeah I'm being emotional this past few weeks... In few weeks, I'll be gone! I mean I'll bid good bye to the things I'm so used to... ang hirap pala talaga ng transition period... chos!

11 May 16

Now I'm torn between this:

And this:

                              -chris perry

Wala bang exception?? Baka may dahilan naman?? (----wala!!! Wag kang ano... tumatawad pa e.. sinabi ng ngang wag daw ijustify e Haha...)

Yeah I may not be able to control the first photo, lam na, di naman talaga makokontrol yung nararamdaman.... chos!!! Pero yung second photo, I need to pin that on my wall para kahit gaano pa katindi yung nararamdaman ko eh may pipigil pa rin sa actions ko... chos!!!

Good night!!

8 May 16

9:06am

Still in bed... Though I've been awake an hour ago when my phone rung... I got a call from my mom asking me when I will be home... got no ticket yet.. she also asked where I would cast my vote... then I told her, di ako nakapagregister. haha.. don't be like me.. bakit kase may registration pa.. diba dapat once Filipino ko automatic na yun??

Anyway, who's your President?? Yung totoo, all of them have flaws naman..Pero Duterte pa rin naman ako.. for sure naman kahit sinong maging Presidente, magrereklamo pa rin mga taong bayan.. remember how Erap and Pnoy were adored by many nung time nila magcampaign?? Eh ano sila ngayon?? Si Binay, napalago ang Makati kaya magagawa raw nya sa Pilipinas yun... ngayon?? Asan sya?? This time, Davao naman for Duterte? I hope and pray it would be different this time. Siguro nga, I hate Duterte's aggressiveness at medyo rude kase sya... pero who knows?? Baka yung katulad nya magpapabago ng Pinas... bahala na.. God Bless the Philippines na lang.

Change topic! Kagabi pa ako feeling annoyed... and a little of that too this morning.. tinutoyo nanaman ako.. haha.. sign of aging... ayoko ng ng nag-iisa.. siguro dahil nasanay na ako sa staffhouse na may kasama... once na lang akong umuwi.. and my brother's always out... kaya nag iisa ako.. ramdam ko ang pagiging malungkot.. chos!! Hayst ayoko ng ganto..

Rise and shine na.. gutom na!

7:45pm
Enjoying watching Ismol Family... Nag-eenjoy kase akong panuorin si Mikael Daez.. He's so cute! Haha

10:10pm
Coke Light as well as Coke Zero don't taste like real Coke!! But I just really need something to drink...  Looking tired too...

 di ko alam bat lagi na lang ako feeling pagod kahit ala naman akong ginagawa.. Tingin ko nga panis laway today.. I haven't spoken to anyone.. except dun sa Ice Cream Vendor sa Robinsons.. haha.. I've been so alone the whole day.. manunuod sana ako ng Civil War.. pero medyo nawala ako sa mood.

11:35pm
Good Night!

Good luck saken

Tomorrow.. magsusupersaiyan ako.. haha.. I'll have to do something I don't want to... oo ayoko kong gawin yung magreport nang diko alam.. diko kabisado, di prepared, walang basis... at di ako confident.. ayokong magmukhang tanga... kaya lang kelangan daw???? Errrrr... E di bahala na si Goku.

Help me God.

GOOD NIGHT!

MAY 2 NAHH!!

Wala lang ang blog na to...  kakausapin ko lang sarili ko.. baliw baliwan? Haha

Yung random emotions lang today.

Yung Monday Morning sickness ko.. ganon pa rin.. pero di masyadong critical today.. dahil siguro sinusulit ko yung time... nakakatamad na pumasok.. nakakawalang gana... but I'm enduring it.

Si WJL... apat na araw ko na syang di nakikita.. asan ba sya?? Okay lang kaya sya?? 3 days na syang absent.. kahit nakakainis sya, nakakamiss rin.... ayoko na sana magsulat na kahit ano tungkol sa kanya kaya lang.. ayan na... nasulat ko na. Haha parang ang haba ng araw na to... nakakainip.. pero somehow.. ayoko naman agad mag May 30!! Malungkot din pala.

Oo ang lungkot din! Diko na maintidihan yung sarili ko... ikaw ba? Naiintindihan mo ba ako? :(

Anyway, kinukulit pa rin ako ni A.M mag-extend. Haysttttttt... ewan ko!!!!. Tsaka.. di naman cguro matutuwa ang lahat pag nag extend ako.. feeling ko di na rin ako productive.. praning din ako.. feeling ko may mga tao din na gusto na akong mawala.. tingin mo?? Wapakels anyway! ;)

Tapos kanina.. feeling ko ang bad ko.. kase may isang taong ayokong pakisamahan.. sorry na. Di lang ako komportable.. minsan naman pinipilit kong maging normal lang.. kaya lang minsan din mas malakas ang sumpong ng pagiging not-so-normal ko. ;(

Tapos... tapos na. Malungkot pa rin... pero ayos lang naman. Lilipas din to.

Good night!