Wearing an old worn out shoes.....

7:30am
Eating pancit canton for breakfast... a note on my table.. a selfie (i think im getting thin again, nasstressed kase ako!)... and I'm wearing my worn out chucks (hi-cut converse)!... this is my oldest pair that's still on my shoe rack, I should have given up on this long time ago... but I'm still keeping it.. see? I'm still wearing it...

1:20pm
Oh! I just woke up.. my first time to over slept during lunch break. I must be tired.. really.

8:25pm
I'm home.. with an annoying selfie from yours truly! Haha.. sorry naman.

9:45pm
To give justice on the title of this blog.... say hi to my old shoes! I'm such a keeper you know...  hehe

11:13pm
Got so much to say but i'm too sleepy as well.

Good night. Sleep.well...

13th of October

9:34 am
Meeting..  meeting...  where are they???

3:45pm
Why o why? Tinatamad ako. Inaantok ako.

5:19pm
Still at the office, at ayaw ko pa umuwi.. I wanna go home but not in our boarding house, in our real home... I'm starting to feel outcast here... errr... I think this is pointless.. ehehe... ano ba yan.. sometimes, I really wish I could talk to someone who doesn't know me.. yung ganong kaartehan.. sasabihin ko lahat lahat, kahit ano! ehehe.. tapos we'll just part ways right after, yung tipong he/she will just keep and seal my thoughts  with him/her without knowing who really  I am, not even my name.... yung feelings and thoughts ko lang.. para kahit isipin nyang baliw ako.. at least once lang nya ako makikita.. haha!... weird ko noh?? Hehe.. di ko naman pwedeng gawin yun... baka mamamatay tao pala yung makakausap ko. Haha!

6:55pm
While waiting for my order.. read this.

It's inspiring.. so when you feel like giving up.. read that!.. it's not that I'm barely breathing right now... hehe.. medyo maybe.. kase paulit ulit na lang yung problema ko.. diko alam kung ano.. hehe.. i'm just confused.. as ever.. okay lang ako.. pag di ko nasusulat to.. dun kana magworry.. that's when.. I'm not okay.. arte much lang... hehe

8:55pm
Home! And I think I deserved this pizza.. all for myself.. haha

Nakakairita noh? Hehe.. pwede namang yung pizza lang kunan.. bakit pati yung haggard kong pagmumukha?.. hehe

Today's Dinah's birthday... she's one of the few good friends I've met... I missed our conversation where bullying one another is our common language.. and all I could give her on her birthday is this collage I made.

10:40pm
Anyway, remember Lee? He will be leaving for abroad this weekend... I'm just really happy for him, it's something he wanted and he needed... but I feel sad for myself...but I can't be selfish... I must not feel bad, I must be happy for whatever my friends are getting.. even if its hard, I must endure it... it's for their own good.. he met me last night thinking he might not be able to show up before he leaves... touched naman ako dun.. hehe... although plan pa namin magkita kita this week with the rest of our friends... eh pero dipa sure... kaya nagpakita na raw sya kahapon... baka di na kami magkita.. mamimiss ko yun.. kahit salbahe pa sya, kaya mean sya saken minsan... kahit yung iba ayaw sa kanya, pero may mga good side naman yun.. dahil kung wala.. hinding hindi ko sya kakaibiganin.. sabi ko naman eh..  i don't look only at the bad side of a person.. dahil ganon din naman ako.. maraming kasamaang taglay. Haha!.. isipin mo na lang kung ikaw, puro kasamaan mo nakikita nila sayo... diba???? Yung iba nga kala mo puro kabaitan ang taglay na pinapakita pero kung makapanakit ng kapwa.. wagas.. tagos! ehehe.. so lets not judge people... sorry kung nakakapagjudge din ako minsan... naku.. malulungkot na talaga ako... pero kaya ko to!

11:45pm
So late now. GOOD NIGHT. SLEEP WELL.

Random Thoughts on the 11th of October

7:41am

Woke up this morning and I thought its not Sunday.. and when I realized it is, I slept back..

Now, I woke up again thinking of getting myself out of here (this place)... I don't wanna think harshly for myself but sometimes I just can't help it.. I honestly don't know what to do about my job, our project is almost completed and anytime soon, I'll be transferred to another project, and I don't want it there (the possible new project for me) ..really! I've been there once, because our area manager asked me to assist their commercial department to work on the change orders proposal... I felt really bad that day because I didn't know that I'll be doing that, I mean, I thought we'll be having meeting only, I feel betrayed (chos lang! Pero medyo) and unprepared! I stayed there the whole day trying to understand the revisions on their structural plans... eerr... then going home from that place is nerve wracking!! You'll get stressed more.. haha

Anyway, if i'll quit my job, what will I do?? I've got two options for my self.. go home!!! If I'll do that, would there be a job waiting for me there?? Second option, work abroad! It maybe tough working there but maybe I'll get paid sufficiently it would sustain my dream of travelling here and there.. at least I know now whats one of the things that would make me happy!! Get to places I never been... but .. (yes, somebody should slap my face for my unending "buts").... I think I'm too old now!!! Errrrrrr... why age matters to me?? I hate me for that.

Anyway, these past few days, I'm feeling really tired! And I don't know why am I not getting tired of feeling that way... I was  having self reflections, why am I doing it??

I believe that it's okay to feel tired when you are working to get something you wished for,

That it's okay to feel exhausted when you know at the end you'll get paid enough to get what you want,

That it's fine to get you heart broken for right reasons....

So, I'm asking myself now... am I tiring myself for something worth my sweat, my tears, my heart aches, my dull boring days, my sleepless nights (just lack of sleeps), my haggard face, stuffs like that.. was it worth it???

I don't know. All I know now is that I'm hungry.. I must take myself out of my bed now to cut my drama.

9:46pm
I've been a little feeling young at heart today for enjoying watching some for-the-kids movies...  I watched GMA's featured movie this morning, Nanny Mcphee... and watched Pan at Robinsons Cinema just this afternoon--... I love those both.

I had foot spa and pedicure too.. chos! Haha

and now playing on this pic...

I'm absolutely feeling not normal right now.. haha.. wait,  need to finish another movie on my phone...

11:26pm
It's late. I don't wanna sleep yet.. I hope you could talk to me.. sometimes I'm thankful that you just listen to me, I couldn't hear any violent reaction from you, when you should... but sometimes, I wish you could talk to me.. but what can I do, you're just my blogger account...

Anyway, aside from wanting myself in other place right now, I wish I could do something I couldn't (magulo ba?).. but I really wish I could but I just can't.. and maybe it wont matter anyway, so just be it. :(

Lets all have a good night sleep now.. I just had my ordinary weekend, I got confused and still confused but it was fine, I'm okay,  .. and  I just hope someone somewhere too had a great day today...

Sleep well.

7th of October

5:10am
Good morning NAIA!.. just about to leave, I  accompanied my mom here for her flight home later.... I'll be heading to office now but its too early... so I stopped by here at the airport lobby...

I'm feeling like a zombie, I think I only have an hour sleep.. I had a whole day meeting yesterday then fetched my mom in the airport in the evening, she slept over in our boarding house then woke up around past 3 or should I say I had not slept.

Gotta take the airport loop bus now.... I could have take the yellow taxi but I don't wanna be the earliest bird in the office.

6:10am
Office! Nakakapagod palang maglakad from MRT Ayala to here...on my way here, nakasalubong ko si Mac at Glenda, they're on their way to other project, may lagnat daw ba ako at ang aga ko?? Hehe... gotta have my breakfast na.

And yey! I've got new bills from my mom.

5th of October

7:57am
It's going to be a busy day... but let music accompany me.. and start it with this, my newly found song...lets have a busy nice day!

 10:57pm
Tired much! But I'm feeling great.. chos!

Good night! Sleep well...

4th of October

My funny face.. delicious food  cooked by my super friend, the silly talks, ...cake, tong-its,  frappe.. the rain.. music.. watched horror movie (pay the.ghost), aldub, sleep, ---that defines my weekend... and I think I haven't enough of this day... I don't want to yet but got to sleep now.

Good night.... :)

3rd of October

Recap of yesterday's activity:


Busy in the morning and had to attend a meeting in the afternoon.

Before going to DCC, I asked the cost engineer  sa kalapit na project na daanan ako sa site namin at makikisabay ako... Our area manager arrived at site before lunch and will attend the same meeting too..

FBB: Ash tara na.
Me: Ai, nasabihan ko na po yung kabilang project na daanan ako.
FBB: eh, di sabihan mong dumating ako, sa aken ka na sasabay.
ME: (naghahanap pa ng palusot).. sa kanila na ako sasabay.. mas masaya sila kasabay.. lol

Then there goes the meeting... sumakit ulo ko.

After the meeting, I headed to Gateway to meet Lee, Marj and Margaux... I was at MRT Ayala when Mac called me, he wanted to meet me sana kaso papunta na nga ako kina lee... gusto ko rin naman sana imeet si Mac, namimiss ko na rin yun.. pero nammiss ko na rin sina Lee, Teh at Madam.. first come first serve na lang..  chos!

Then at the MRT... rush hour.. I hated it kaso, naiinip na yung mga naghihintay saken..  so there I make sapalaran.. parang mamatay ako sa sisiksikan.. Thank God, I'm still alive...

Tapos yun na.. we had dinner at Kabab Cubao.. chickaness... Lee had a good news, I was happy for him... kung ano man yun, secret daw muna. Hehe

Then we went home.. Madam and I took the bus.
 While on the bus.
Me: Kakausapin mo ba ako?
Marj: Bakit?
Me: Magheheadset ako.
Marj: (laughing).. ano? Nakakatakot ka na man (because I was serious asking her kung kakausapin ba nya ako).. wag kana maghead set, hindi to provincial bus.
Me: Magsosound trip lang!! E
Marj: Wag kana magheadset! Mag usap tayo.

TAPOS NA FOR THAT DAY.

Today:

Feeling sick in the morning..then na-busy ako sa work, nakalimutan kong parang magkakasakit ako..

In the afternoon, went to cubao to meet belle, my highschool friend... who happens to be just living one block away from Margaux... so I have them introduced to one another..  and as usual, dahil gagabihin na ako para umuwi, makikitulog nanaman ako.. quota na talaga ako dito.. ang sarap din kase ng fried chicken ni teh.. haha!