Woke up this morning and I thought its not Sunday.. and when I realized it is, I slept back..
Now, I woke up again thinking of getting myself out of here (this place)... I don't wanna think harshly for myself but sometimes I just can't help it.. I honestly don't know what to do about my job, our project is almost completed and anytime soon, I'll be transferred to another project, and I don't want it there (the possible new project for me) ..really! I've been there once, because our area manager asked me to assist their commercial department to work on the change orders proposal... I felt really bad that day because I didn't know that I'll be doing that, I mean, I thought we'll be having meeting only, I feel betrayed (chos lang! Pero medyo) and unprepared! I stayed there the whole day trying to understand the revisions on their structural plans... eerr... then going home from that place is nerve wracking!! You'll get stressed more.. haha
Anyway, if i'll quit my job, what will I do?? I've got two options for my self.. go home!!! If I'll do that, would there be a job waiting for me there?? Second option, work abroad! It maybe tough working there but maybe I'll get paid sufficiently it would sustain my dream of travelling here and there.. at least I know now whats one of the things that would make me happy!! Get to places I never been... but .. (yes, somebody should slap my face for my unending "buts").... I think I'm too old now!!! Errrrrrr... why age matters to me?? I hate me for that.
Anyway, these past few days, I'm feeling really tired! And I don't know why am I not getting tired of feeling that way... I was having self reflections, why am I doing it??
I believe that it's okay to feel tired when you are working to get something you wished for,
That it's okay to feel exhausted when you know at the end you'll get paid enough to get what you want,
That it's fine to get you heart broken for right reasons....
So, I'm asking myself now... am I tiring myself for something worth my sweat, my tears, my heart aches, my dull boring days, my sleepless nights (just lack of sleeps), my haggard face, stuffs like that.. was it worth it???
I don't know. All I know now is that I'm hungry.. I must take myself out of my bed now to cut my drama.
9:46pm
I've been a little feeling young at heart today for enjoying watching some for-the-kids movies... I watched GMA's featured movie this morning, Nanny Mcphee... and watched Pan at Robinsons Cinema just this afternoon--... I love those both.
I had foot spa and pedicure too.. chos! Haha
and now playing on this pic...
I'm absolutely feeling not normal right now.. haha.. wait, need to finish another movie on my phone...
11:26pm
It's late. I don't wanna sleep yet.. I hope you could talk to me.. sometimes I'm thankful that you just listen to me, I couldn't hear any violent reaction from you, when you should... but sometimes, I wish you could talk to me.. but what can I do, you're just my blogger account...
Anyway, aside from wanting myself in other place right now, I wish I could do something I couldn't (magulo ba?).. but I really wish I could but I just can't.. and maybe it wont matter anyway, so just be it. :(
Lets all have a good night sleep now.. I just had my ordinary weekend, I got confused and still confused but it was fine, I'm okay, .. and I just hope someone somewhere too had a great day today...
Sleep well.
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