Home!

9:17am

Waiting for our boarding time. . Once again and what I am always praying for, a safe flight for us... hope not much of turbulence up there.. it's my nth time of flying in a plane but instead of getting used to it, I think I'm developing a flight phobia...  aside from the news of a plane crash here and there... my last flight from kuala lumpur was I think my worst experience... anyway, if its time then it's time!.. you know what I mean... coz this shouldn't hinder my passion in travelling.. chosera! Hehe.. see you home in a while.. inshaallah..

12:45pm

Landed safely.. though we're 35minutes delayed due to traffic at runway in NAIA...

Let me tell you a story  about me and my seatmate on the plane a while ago... I'm not that someone who initiate a conversation with a stranger, I was just answering his questions with simplified answers or I will just smile at him when it seems that he wants me to laugh with his stories... he speaks a lot about himself, even about his lovelife ... I just listened... I just let him say whatever he wants but I was discreet about myself,  and I lied  about my exact address. He asked my name and he heard and pronounced it wrongly, and I just agreed on how he heard it... and I lied too that my boyfriend works abroad when he asked me why am I not traveling with him (I guess that was just his way to know if I have a boyfriend.. or assuming lang ako).... then he shut up for a moment, I was thankful, haha!.. I think I'm rude. .. I know there's nothing wrong with having a conversation with a stranger, it's just that something is wrong with me... then maybe he noticed that I'm being terrified every time the plane moves roughly , he keeps on asking me if I'm okay... and I keep on answering him, yes I am..

2:00pm

Went at my cousins house for her graduation celebration.

10:35pm
Picture tripping with my sister is actually like a tradition everytime I go home.

Good night!

Haggard Day

Today: Dinner

And picture tripping... Actually, I don't wanna take a photo of myself today, I feel so ugly and haggard.

Goodnight!

Today's Words Left Unspoken

I miss doing this.. so here's my five unspoken lines to 5 different people.

1. I wont say sorry to you... though I feel a little sorry from deep inside. I'm a bit guilty.. but I should not.. it's the right thing I thought would be best for us. I hope I'm not misjudging you... and you wont curse me for that...

2. I hope it's really making you happy... The changes will make me feel sad, but it would be a relief if its truly making you happy.. don't mind me..

3. What we're you thinking?? You confused me, am I giving you a bad impression? It's okay.. I don't want you to see me a picture perfect one.. coz I'm not...

4. When will you ever get my point? There are things that are better unsaid.. yes its better that way! I know you want me to say everything I feel about everything, about how I feel with anyone...  I understand, sometimes, I do agree.. but people change too, it's either they don't wanna anything from you... or you'll change them when you say the words you're not suppose to say. It's unclear, it maybe not the right thing... thank you but let it be that way.

5. I saw something today that reminds me of you.. then I miss you.. and I hate the feeling... coz I couldn't do anything about it.


That's it! To this 5 people.. Good night!

Today, I'm crazy

Hey! I'm already feeling really sleepy.. but it seems like I have a lot to say kahit pa wala naman tong masyadong halaga...

Syempre, Monday ngayon, magsisimula talaga lagi yan sa Monday Morning Sickness.. yung tipong tamad na tamad kang pumasok... alam mo naman ako, nag iinarte pag Monday. Haha

I was evaluated too today... I was given a chance to contest my ratings... kilala mo ako, di masyado ako demanding... pero yung evaluation ko e yung parang so underrated! Yung parang sinadyang kelangan talagang icontest mo... parang, whatttt??? Do I really deserve that?? Hehe... or yung tipong sasabihin mo na, " are you testing me to fight for what I deserve?? ... and I did fight for what I deserve...

At the end part  of the evaluation, I was asked about that moment na umabsent ako dahil pinapaattend ako ng meeting sa head office.. I posted about that, naalala mo ba? Diko alam pano magrereact?? Pero natatawa ako.. I was asked if "not feeling well" was only my excuse, so I could not attend the meeting.. I was caught off guard, lam mo namang obvious pag nagsisinungaling ako, haha... I answered.. "I was really feeling not better that time but I can endure it, partly I really didn't want to attend, kase pang PM lang naman yun, pano pag ang tanong e opinion ng mga PM, e d para naman akong outcast dun, tsaka ayaw ko rin na baka masagot sagot ko pa si sir na ayaw ko umattend".. basta ganon yung point ng sagot ko pero sana sinabi ko na lang masama loob ko kaya sumama pakiramdam ko.. haha.. pero baka rude naman.

I don't know what I really feel, pero natatawa ako.. I was surprised with her questioning me that.. because the day after my absence.. i was treated by them normally, extra nice pa nga e! Kaya akala ko, grabe naman, di man lang nila nafeel na nagrebelde ako.. haha.. but this day, I was like asking myself, nadissappoint ko ba talaga sila?? Nathretened? Di ba nila inexpect na kaya kong gawin yun?? That was few weeks ago, pero bakit pinaabot pa sa evaluation yung pagquestion non... but its not making me regret my action....  I would still do the same thing.

And we talked about my QS again.. I told her everything.. yung mga reklamo ko... but after that, medyo naguilty ako kase medyo behave yung QS ko today... kahit papano naman minsan may mabuti rin syang ginawa.. mga 15% haha..  shall I feel really guilty?? Sabi ko nga, magtitiis na akong magtrain ulit ng Q.S kesa naststress akong nakikita syang halos masuka sa ginagawa! Di na nga productive.. Exaggerated pero madalas talaga akong mastress dahil sa kanya... dapat ba akong maguilty???? Yung patience ko abot ozone layer na pero baka yung impact ng actions nung QS ko e hanggang Jupiter kaya diko kinaya... haha.. sabihin mo na! Maguguilty ba ako??

Anyway.. 3:30  pm , lee called me he'll meet me... that he will be out around 5pm.. so I said yes, kaso 5:30 na, andun pa sya sa site nila... I was kinda naiinip and tired... so with my typical excuse, sabi ko uuwi na ako, maglalaba pa akong uniform... I think I sounded impatient... kaya ihanda ko na rin sarili ko pag di na nagpakita sa akin si lee... hehe.. tuluyan na akong mawawalan na friends... yes, because I am too bad, i'm driving people away.. hmppp.. okay lang, sanay naman ako.... ako pa????? Hehe.. kung ayaw nila sa ugali ko, di wag... ang sama ko talaga noh?? Tingin ko may sumpong ako ng pagiging abnormal today.... Hehe

And one thing.. mabalik tayo sa evaluation.. my recommendation was... " be sociable ......", see??? Haha

Sige na.. itigil na ang kabaliwang ito.

Good night!

22March15

Last night was my first time to sleep over somewhere at Malolos Bulacan.. we visted a friend who gave birth to a cute baby girl...  had also a bonding moment with her super kulit son... 

Before going back to Manila this morning, we passed by at this church that I used to see and read only in books and  to the old ten peso bill... ofcourse I didn't get inside since I'm not a catholic.

We reached  Trinoma Mall before noon  and decided to watch Cinderella.. it was nice but don't expect any twist from what you have read on fairy tales books when you we're young,.. And videoke time right after.. hehe.. and food tripping too... or should I say chocolate/mocca frapuccino too...  

I want to say much sana kaso I'm sleepy na. GOOD NIGHT!

The Unexpected Shoes!

Buying this shoes is a bit impulsive.. its not part of my plan or least not today.. my friend asked me to use my credit card in purchasing him a new pair of shoes so he can pay it in 3 months installment... to get that.deal, we must purchase worth of 5 thousand, kaya just like what we did last year with this same person, I bought a new pair of shoes as well so we could reach the minimum allowable amount... , kaya kahit di naman ako maka "Nike shoes" girl kase feeling ko naman di bagay saken yung mga ganong shoes.. hehe..  napabili na rin....

yun lang. Good night!

15March15

My day starts with this, 

(Post deleted..)

maybe I don't have to rewrite it, my first thing in the morning says it all... minsan I write a lot, hindi na nakakatuwa, nakakairita para sa iba.. haha.. 

Gusto ko sana sa bahay lang, watch a movie, do some household chores, matulog,  but it seems that I have an obligation to a relative of mine na ipasyal sya sa kamaynilaan... chos! Hehe so I met her and show her around Manila... kahit pa diko alam san sya dadalhin... what so nice about Manila ba???

So not minding the excruciating heat of the sun, I got this pictures of myself... hindi ulit nakakatuwa...haha!  Pero wala ulit basagan ng trip, sabi nila. Haha

The Poste Girl!!

Anyway, sorry for the annoying pictures above, babawi na lang ako sa mga sunset photos na to I took earlier this afternoon.. its beautiful! Di ba? Gusto kong maging makata! Haha.. ai, masisira nanaman yung moment.. lam mo yun?? The sun sets here and will shine at the other part of the world at the same time... di ba? Amazing??? Haha.. ang arte ko, may ganon ganon pa... 

I had a long and tiring day.. but it wasn't enough.. I don't wanna sleep yet, but I have to. GOOD NIGHT!

Friday d 13th of March

Yes. I'm starting this post with my selfie.. pampawalang gana lang.. haha!

So how's your day today?? Ako? Ganon pa rin.. ramdam na ramdam ko ng nauubusan na ako ng mga friends... i mean, they're all far from me... sooner or later, I'll be forgotten.. maiintindihan ko naman... dahil nasa ibang projects or lugar na sila.. they'll meet new people... the tendency of them forgetting me is at its high risk.. hehe... its soo unfair!! Haha.. joke lang.. nagdadrama lang ako.. kayang kaya ko naman to.. ako pa.. sanay kaya akong maging independent...

Kase naman, it's friday... this used to be bonding time.. and no one's available to attend the friday group, kundi ako lang! Haha... Naku, I need to get my self used to this.. oo nga, ang arte ko naman.. eh homebody naman talaga ako ever since..

So after eating my dinner at landmark, I tried to window shop, Pay day ngayon! Kaso, I was impatient, anong bibilhin ko?? Diko alam, so I went home...  as early as 6:30pm, I'm home na..  watched videos on YouTube, tapos nung nabored ako, I looked at myself in the mirror, I talked to myself parang baliw...... hanggang sa eto, alas onse na pala.. oras na para matulog... at itigil na ang wala masyadong kwentang blog na to..

Ay teka lang pala, just wanna share this..

Because I love letters that are hand written, this caught my attention:

Nung una, di naman ako natatawa, nacocornihan ako...tsaka parang may nabasa na akong ganto dati... pero natawa na ako dun sa... "I'm fly away to many leaves"..haha

Sige, final na...Good night!

Lonely Monday??

7:30am

Done eating my breakfast, I prepared this myself since the utility men were nowhere to be found, and I don't wanna depend on them for preparing my breakfast...  I came in early on my usual daily arrival at office,  most of my officemates we're not around yet ... Mac and Jardine were surprised too  that I'm an early bird today..

Anyway this could be a lonely Monday... The Monday sickness is still on.. This is also the first day Lee won't be around... who would be the source of my laughter starting this day?? You know, he' kinda clown to me.. Hehe... Got to start working now.

6:25pm

I'm already home! Dropped by at SM Save More to buy  something to eat for tonight... wala munang dinner sa labas, wala na yung partner ko sa kainan ng dinner.. 

Been busy today.. feeling ko rin medyo tanga ako today.. , yung tipong hinayaan ko lang mag mukhang tanga.... or maybrme I'm just too paranoid. hahaha...  there were things na late reaction na ako. Hayst.. 

10:30pm

So was it really a lonely Monday? Well, it could be.. But I went so busy I forget about it.. i forgot to feel cheerful either.. so, it.was neutral... I was fine.

I just hope these friends would remain the same, they might meet new set of friends, but wont forget the old ones.

Goodnight!

Someone's Last Day at D.P

...So everyone is leaving me! Haha.. The current project I am now is probably our longest running project or at least one of the longest...  I was assigned at this project,  (The Discovery Primea) for almost 5 years now, I've seen people just "come and go", some resigned, some was transferred to other project... and If I wont resign now (was tired of saying that diko rin nagagawa haha), surely I'll be the last one standing....hehe.. no kidding, as the cost engineer of this project, got no choice but be responsible for the close out.. so the agony of being left alone is all up to me.. Ang haba ng intro ko, walang connection sa title.. hehe...

One of my close friend in this project will be transferred to other project, just like the others,  I'm sad as if it wasn't expected... eh malilipat naman lahat... I've explained the reason why I'm happy for him but sad for me in my previous blog,..

This blog is just to narrate how we spent our last day as work mates.

Started with picture taking at the office...

Had some sort of reminiscing the past.. Lee found this picture while he was fixing his stuffs, he was about to throw it, kaya sabi ko, akin na lang.

Picture taking outside office too.. We we're wearing  same brand of polo shirts we bought at SM Megamall yesterday.. trip lang.

Tambay at Glorietta... Dinner at Gerry's Grill..Dessert at Red Mango Greenbelt..

That would be all.. parang normal day lang naman.. dumdrama lang ako! Haha...

GOODNIGHT!

6March15

Yun lang. Gusto ko pa sana magkwento kaso antok na antok nako.

That Thing Called Mixed Emotions

Before I'll start my story today, look at me at the above picture... that's how someone been thru a lot of mixed emotions in just one day looked like.... yes, all sorts of emotion: sad, upset, happy, pressured, overwhelmed, tensed, impatient, felt like crying, smiling alone.. etc etc....

During our meeting today, it was announced the Lee will be transferred to other project. I was happy for him because it was something he wanted, but sad for me because it's already too lonely at site. I'll miss a lunch and dinner buddy.. yah, it's really making me sad, they are teasing me that I'm gonna cry.. of course I won't... but at some point, I really feel like crying. Lee is that kind of friend who you would hate sometimes, he annoys me a lot,  he even puts my self esteem to its lowest level, he would mock me several times, he would laugh at me and calls me ugly and baduy.. haha, and countless  are those days I've texted him that I hated him, that he disappoints me a lot... but no matter how I would avoid him, he always managed to win me back.. hey, don't take that romantically..haha.. I never really had a close male friend that I could share my deepest thoughts with... until that day I met him... but not beyond genuine friendship... just to make things clear. .. though most disliked him, I remained unaffected.. I always tell him "lee, hindi ka mabait, pero mabuti kang tao".. others just can't see that. When I'm upset, he could make me laugh.. when I'm confuse, he gave me advises that surprises me, sometimes I thought I knew everything about what I should do, but his points of view are sensible... kahit minsan ang arte arte lang ng paraan ng pagpapaliwanag nya.

Today, my boss pressured me to do something .. but I didn't do that.. at least I know how to say I can't when its truly not doable... and I was really busy working on my billing today.

Today.. I've been upset too with my QS... instead of improving, he's actually deteriorating... what have I done wrong?? Or something is really wrong with him..

Today.. I'm overwhelmed that my previous QS is really quick in answering my queries thru emails... I'm no longer his supervisor, but just like before, he makes me feel that he didn't want to make things hard for me.. I don't know, I don't even think that I've been a good boss to him.. pinababayaan ko nga sya. Hehe.

Today, I've finally spoken to my area manager, also with my project manager, regarding the performance of my Q.S because I couldn't take it anymore! I've been really patient about him, I'm not that kind of "reklamdora" too...okay lang na paulit ulit lang ako.. but I see no effort in him, it's unhealthy na raw kase... I took it too long but finally I broke my silence...

In that moment, I  was hesitant,  a little guilty and unsure, Mac came in. I feel glad that he was there at that time... I know Mac cares for me, not romantically again huh??? Hehe.. he was one of my batchmate who entered Primea.. we became friends.. I remembered last valentines day when he told me he loves me, and i told him i love you too...  haha... walang malisya! Friends lang kami... he's just a sweet guy friend that I don't mind saying I love him. Hahaha.. ulit, walang malisya! Haha

Before, the day ends.. Margaux, Lee, Mela and I had a delicious dinner at Greenbelt..   nagutom ako sa araw na to... Glad margaux came, because I meant it when I told her, I'm needing a friend today..

And I went home smiling alone kahit tired pa ako.. okay na ako.

Sleepy now..

Good night.. tomorrow is another day.

3March15

7:28am
The first thing that made me smile genuinely today is this picture.... (after frowning  like the whole day yesterday.. haha.. someone's really getting into my nerves). This was a post from a celebrity I followed on I.G. Isn't this thing cute???

12:40pm
Lunch break.. done watching The Walking Dead S5E12.. a little boring episode... but it keeps me wondering what could be the obstacle this time... There should be something about Alexandria.. if there's none, then the series could end there... and Rick's new look, like he was 10 years younger.

5:51pm

Just read that on my facebook feeds....  ako?? I think di ako nagkakamali.. though I really wish I am.. hehe... or the other way around.

5:59pm
Waiting for our food to be served here at ravioli.

9:10pm
I don't know how does it feel when people who care about you decide for you and your future,  believing it's the best for you, not really considering if it could make you happy... just saying...

9:45pm
About to sleep.. let's remind ourselves of the saying that "You can't change how people treat you or what they say about you. All you can do is to change how you react to it".

Good night!

The First Day of March

I feel like  I've invade the Metro today.. It's my day off but I've been really tired getting here and there.. Since I slept over at my father's hotel last night, I think I hadn't had enough sleep. Woke up early to send him off to the airport at around 6am..  We   took a taxi going there but when my brother and I went home, we tried the shuttle bus--lrt--jeepney, to explore new things, we had not much to carry too, also we're not in a hurry anyway...

My father had a quick reminiscing our childhood days this morning.. he said he's glad that I have overcome my shyness... ( I'm still shy! Just trying hard not to.. hehe)... he remembered those days when I was a little girl, I don't want to go to school alone... should I say, I don't get along with my classmates because I'm the timid and anti social one.. well, I think that little girl is still inside me..  anyway, he gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek this morning... yes, he's sweeter than I could be.. He always do that every time he or me leaves.  Yes he does and I don't ahaha... I think I've grown too old for that... I'm such a ________... just fill in the blank.

When I reached home, I had a quick nap , I even had a weird dream..

At past 12 pm, I need to get back to the airport to pick up a relative using my new discovered route, ( I'm always taking the taxi before, but since I want to explore the city as if I'm a newbie... and its cheaper too), jeepney-lrt-shuttle bus... at first I thought I accidentally alighted at the wrong station, but it was actually the right station! Haha muntik pa akong sumakay ulit ... Then I accompany my guest to Quezon Avenue... there she will be met by another relative.

Sometimes, I just want to get myself a lift on a train, go anywhere, randomly alight at any unfamiliar station too... kaso di naman pwedeng nasa MRT or LRT lang.. anong feeling ko nasa Europe?? Haha.. sana nga... This is LRT Pedro Gil Station.

Stole a photo of the EDSA while I'm alone crossing  the overpass of MRT Quezon Avenue Station.

Appreciated being in front of the train...

Details of simple things are actually a good scenery.. I don't know, maybe for me it is, sometimes, I am too free of thinking about the world chaotic things, kaya may time lang akong iappreciate yung mga ganto...  Maybe I am blessed at anyhow for having a space on my mind to see and appreciate things that others don't even got that moment to see what I've been seeing.... I mean, they were there too, or baka mas maganda pa yung view nila, di lang nila makita.

Before going home, had to treat myself with footspa, manicure, pedicure as well... and a little shaving of my eyebrows... haha..I can't do it alone kase.. I hope my boss wont notice, he keeps on teasing me....

More pictures for today..

Sorry if I'm overloaded with my selfie! I keep on repeating my reason naman diba? Hehe

Words left unspoken for someone:

Hey there, nice picture. I'm glad to see what  you've been seeing.. feels like I was there too.. its just that, I hate you. :)

 I think I had enough today.. So, Good night now!