soooooooooooo T I R E D!

If in a very small possible way you stumble here on my webpage, specifically at this post, then I advise you to stop reading… this is rated PG, coz I’m about to do some drama…. Hehe

I don’t know why it’s so easy for me to write sad and negative things than those happy ones..

This past few days, I’ve been hearing myself pronouncing these lines : “I’m tired na”, “ayoko na”, “so exhausted”…  to what? I’m not sure if it’s just literally of my job with some mean people surround me, so toxic na! if during my earlier months i was complaining because i had less task to do where i found it so boring and dull, now i can't figure out which tasks should take place first and be prioritized... "maloloka na ako! kaya ko naman, but it will take time before I'll learn everything, add to that the people who will throw you unjust criticism and instead of helping you, they will try to put you down.

 Or could it be I’m tired of my life, sorry I thought I wasn’t that morbid anymore, (but, hey, I won’t entertain suicide here, good thing I’m afraid of pain.. hehe)..  sometimes i just felt everything going on in me is meaningless, like i had wasted so much time.

Or I’m so exhausted waiting for something--- that maybe never existed or had gone so long time ago me not knowing it.

I'm starting to get sick of this place, I'm here because i'm into my life's sense quest, but i think i'm a bit lost, i couldn't find the way, i'm not confident enough to take risk, im stuck.

I've run out of words to uplift me when I'm down, i've got no friends here to give me advices.

I hate hearing people saying that they want to find themselves.. why?! are they lost? I think they’re just denial! …and honestly I’m one of them too… so that means I hate myself too.. hahaha..

I'm not tolerating nor welcoming this random thoughts that are eating me and outsmarted me, diko lang talaga maiiwasan, pasensya na.

Anyway, what’s the value of this blog? Its meaningless too, I’m sleepy na kasi kay tatapusin ko nan g ganon ganon na lang.. hehe

Good night!

PS: writing this had at least lighten up my mood. see? effective naman kahit papano!