6/15/2012: in random thoughts

I’m about to sleep but I can’t, I’m confused! Ahhhhh... I’m taking a risk, I’m about to let go an opportunity… Oh, God, help me… I hope I’m doing the right thing, “laging nasa huli ang pagsisisi", but why it seems that I am already regretting?.... sometimes, I thought I play safe, but I end up losing it, I hope not this time.

Its 10:14pm, I’m still wearing my company uniform. I’m hungry, I was stuffed a while ago so I didn’t eat rice for dinner, and I’m on the state of idleness to prepare for something to eat.

I was thinking of old friends, were they really been my friends? Errrr… I wanna be independent, I don’t wanna rely on anyone.. what’s wrong with me? At some point, I feel like I’m being betrayed.. haha, I’m sorry if I feel bitter sometimes.. but still, thanks to my few good friends..

I’m stupid, I know. How can I be soooo stupid? Hahaha.. I hate this!.. you, yes you, can you just get out of my head???

Am I waiting for a ship in an airport? Hahaha…

What am I gonna do now?... sleep maybe.

               

INDEPENDENCE DAY!

Asking me how did I celebrate my freedom today?  Well, nothing so bizarre, same as my old boring days, but you know how good I am in handling dull days…. So if ever you wish to get jaded then stick with me! Haha.. just kidding.

What’s so good about this day is I didn’t spend so much money, I didn’t go anywhere.. I went out only to send my dirty clothes to the laundry shop.

I watched different genre of movies. I food tripped, and I’m glad that my appetite is back, could it be because I stopped taking the food supplements for quite a while now, or because I am no longer inlove nor broken hearted? Hmmmm, I think I’m still but forget about that corniness Whahahaha…

I’ve watched some parts of the sci-fi series GRIMM. Well, that was fine.

I’ve enjoyed the dance musical film HONEY2, im not really a fan of such movies, you know that dancing thing--- but this is another exception, it was great.

I’ve roll back the Thai move CRAZY LITTLE THING CALLED LOVE… again??? Yes, childish I maybe, but I loved it so much….

And just a while ago, I had an horror film, THE TRAVELLER, it almost got rotten on my laptop but since I had run out of movies, I got no choice but to watch it, I’ve finish it though that one is really gross and sickening.

It was a long day for me but I don’t wanna go back to work yet… (sigh) but I have to…

Good night now!

PS: Happy Bday to my eldest bro!

Happy Independence Day Philippines!

 

THE LAST LETTER

This is going to be my last letter to you EXJR… I think I have done so many lasts but I hope this one is for real. This afternoon I asked for a sign if I should stop doing this, and the answer was YES!.. I know it would be hard, it could also mean I should stop writing… I just love writing when my heart is breaking.

 

Dear EXJR,

You’re forgiven, but I shouldn’t forget how much you caused me pain, not for now, maybe someday, coz that’s my only defense to stop  this foolishness… yah, I’ve been so stupid believing that you liked me too. It’s not your fault anyway—that I’m still convincing myself.

Honestly, I’m still into to you, I hate to admit it but I must stop it. Running away from you is the right thing to do, though that’s not what makes me happy. I’m pushing you away but that’s not really what's inside my heart. I want you to be happy even with someone else, but that’s not what I really feel.

 This hurts, but I have to say goodbye now… I wish happiness for the both of us.

GOODBYE EXJR!

6/10/2012

So what’s for today?? Aside from Pacquiao losing it, no comment to that, I’m glad that I’ve accomplished my checklist for today.

And I’ve eaten so much food too, I cooked for breakfast, chicken liver, and I made spaghetti too…

Part of my checklist is to visit ate Vicky at Manila Doctors Hospital, before heading there, I dropped by at Robinson Mall to buy her Egg Pie at Goldilocks, I craved for a Frappucino too, so I got Starbuck’s Choco Chip Frap, then I took out One piece chicken at Bon Chon so I could have something to eat at Ate Vickie’s room. She offered me Picnik and grapes too… I told you, I have been food tripping today… and I feel great about that, I’m having a good appetite!

This is how looked like this morning before doing anything.

And myself just I arrived home… don’t mind my pimples and my oily face. hehe

What do you do when you don't know what to do?

Just a line from the movie I’ve watched a while ago.. “This means war”, that’s a good one, I forgot that I was upset .. Thanks to Lee  ( my officemate), he recommended it to me, he actually almost forced me to watch it the other day in the office after work, but I said I will just copy it.. hehe.. I heard myself laugh countless for this.. It’s a movie about love and friendship..

Anyway…. What to do when you don’t know what to do??? Arrr, I just did something I think I mustn’t... haha, but I did already.. that’s just an interruption…. And what I just did I guess isn’t an answer…. I shouldn’t have done that! Wahhhhh.. haha

Seriously, what do you do when you don’t know what to do????? I hope somebody could answer me

My friend Jegs

This is my Friend since my childhood days, I call her Jegs. We’re neighbors, we went to same school in our elementary days, she was my best friend then. We had petty fights I could smile everytime I remember, we used to go home together after class, but one day we quarreled, I don’t even remember the reason why, she took the other side of the road and me on the other while walking home.. when I reached the gate of our house, she looked at me, we smiled at each and friends again.. haha..

I’m a bit shy as ever that I asked my younger sister or my brother to send my messages to her if have to ask or say something, I wrote them in a letter and she will reply too (dipa uso ang cellphone at internet non).. haha.. I could go along with my siblings but I’m so shy then, as if those people along the way would bite me, so I preferred those letters.

But in our secondary years, we enrolled to different school, swear that disheartened me!

We’re together again in college, dorm mates and room mates as well. But she graduated first, she took 4-year course and I’m in engineering.

She found new friends and so do I, but ofcourse our friendship didn't end there. Meeting new people doens't mean forgetting the old ones... especially those people-for-keeps.

Years after, we became room mates again in a place far away from our hometown, this time, because of our jobs, she worked in a call center industry and yours truly in a construction company. But after several months, she went home and proceed her study in a lawschool.

We had our picture tripping here yesterday and this morning before her flight back home. She had her 2 months internship here in Manila.

w/ our friendship bags as we call it

That’s it..

TOXIC!

This previous week and this coming week I declare the busiest of all. I have so much work to do, maloloka na ako! Ahaha.. what’s disappointing is I couldn’t do it well due to limited time. I couldn’t balance the petty cash replenishment, because I wasn’t able to monitor it cautiously since I’m doing something else, I was having quantity reconciliation with our project owner’s quantity surveyor. And I need to update my quantities right after the recon according to the reconciled one, as well as the keyplans. The SUT’s are piling up.. The other items to be estimated, I haven’t done it yet, I’m afraid I forgot some. I hope I haven’t missed  to log and record the necessary documents.

I was even given another item to estimate, an urgent matter. But how in the world will I be able to do that when I actually have on queue schedules for another reconciliation, I haven’t even reviewed those items, damn, I don’t wanna look stupid by not knowing the things I have done.. My superiors committed that we must finish the items for reconciliation even if it take overtime (without asking me kung kaya ko!)… ofcorse kaya ko naman, but how bout my usual task?.. I swear I’m speeding up and extending time as well…even if my mind is actually not working well due to exhaustion … I love being busy but this I guess its too much it would kill me… haha

I’m not complaining, I don’t wanna complain! Should I?